After our
File was accepted
the Philippines, our names were placed on the list
families awaiting matching. It was possible that an update of the psychosocial assessment we be asked by the authorities Philippines, one year after the file is processed by the ICAB, if there had not yet had a child proposal . In our case, we waited 17 months before having a child proposal and they have never asked for an update of our psychosocial assessment. During our wait, we knew the time was about 18-24 months. By cons, we knew how children were paired and knew we could never know in advance that our turn would come. In the Philippines,
social workers who have children to provide international adoption (after attempting to place locally or regionally in the Philippines), and whose country
Court issued a final severing all ties of parentage, report for
Office ICAB to see the folders on hold twinning. Then they must choose
two families depending on the characteristics of the child and to submit their first and second choice
Investment Committee. Then, the committee supports the recommendation of social worker and submit such recommendation to
Board for final approval. So this is not a waiting list with a specific rank.
After 15 months, our contact has joined us to have contact contact us as soon as possible, in cases where we received a proposal of a child. She asked us, too, to open a U.S. account
in a Toronto Dominion Bank
Because the Philippines would require only dealt with in these banks for the costs accompanying the proposal of a child.
During this long wait, we're not busy that time seemed too long. In fact, it's only me who was worried. My spouse philosophies of life, which I tried, as much as possible, to imitate. One of his philosophies was that we should not lose energy on something we have no power. For him, what was difficult, it was not waiting for the match, but does reveal himself when mounting the file and the costs associated therewith.
So to fill my free time, I forced my husband has attended two conferences
(attachment and sleep disorder) . I did say forced because my husband did not see the usefulness of attending these conferences. Being, itself, adopted, and her 2 sisters, an uncle and a cousin, he did not understand what he absolutely had to know about attachment and sleep. Me, I'm a child adopted internationally was different. Also, I bought two books
on adoption''The adopted child in the world (in fifteen chapters and a half)''and''The child who hurts, the child who hurts,''which I was the only reading them because my husband still could not see what he could bring us such information. When we arrived home with our child, I could only find that my husband was right, because our child has disproved some theories learned at these conferences and in books. To be sure of being understood, I said that I am not saying not to attend the lectures or not to buy these books, but to attend and buy them if you feel the need and do not take everything they say literally. I believe that mistakes faient by health professionals are: to all children in one basket, because in reality each child is unique and too transpose on children, the problems seen in their offices. In my opinion, it is wrong to believe that the majority of adopted children have problems. To say that I am using the 5 stories of adoption that I know in my spouse's family and the adoption of my son. For more details on my views, I will describe the reactions of my son in the section of the trip to the Philippines and arrived in Canada. Finally, I do not regret having attended these conferences and have bought these books because it made me realize that it is We parents know our children and most need to trust their instincts. If we feel we have done everything for our child and we feel he is not happy, then it's time to seek help and to apply what health professionals recommend.
As a second activity to pass the time, I enrolled in 2 forums
on adoption in the Philippines (
FUFPhilippines and
Adoption Philippines ). I was not present in the discussions on these forums, I preferred getting information for myself. For cons, I have not managed to get all the information I was looking for. I'm kind of curious, I wanted to know in detail what would happen to me. Therefore, I think this blog will be useful for people who, like me, looking all the little details of an adoption. Towards the end of our expectations, I went on a discussion forums and having had our proposal, I asked questions. However, I found them vague answers, I would have liked more details. I noticed that people on this forum are not very explicit, perhaps out of modesty. Subsequently, I present to share my personal experience and to disclose my su opinion some people, when I considered necessary.
So we started buying
accessories for children and prepare the room
our future child. All purchases were based on that we did not know the sex of the child. Indeed, throughout the proceedings for the adoption of our child, I compared them to a pregnancy. The date of acceptance was tantamount to a positive pregnancy test. Waiting time a proposal was equal to a pregnancy, but a much longer gestation. In addition, throughout this expectation (pregnancy), I was talking to my future child, touching my head and not my belly. I tried to visualize in my head and talk to him, as would a pregnant mom. When the bed came into his room and whenever I passed I imagined sleeping peacefully. Also, every 1st of each month, we celebrated our x-month wait. We knew the exact number of months that we wait and towards the end, I calculate, in days. So, yes I found the painfully long time, but I lived it well.
Similarly, we made an appointment for vaccines
the travel clinic at CLSC our region. The travel clinic advised us on immunization, which remains the best means of preventing many infectious diseases. Everything depended on the season and region as we were traveling, some vaccines have been suggested for a safe journey to the Philippines. So in April 2008, we received the cons
Boostrix Diphtheria, tetanus
the and
pertussis which is a booster that we had during our youth. As the second injection, we received
Imovax Polio Polio
the cons, who is also a reminder of the vaccine that we had during our youth. Then I received the vaccine
MMR-II the cons
measles, rubella
the and
mumps because the nurse thought that I had not received enough dose, during my youth. Like any vaccine, we received the cons
Vivaxim typhoid and hepatitis A
. Like last injection, we received the Engerix B
against the hepatitis B
. Then, I received 5 injections spread over my 2 arms and 2 legs and my spouse 4. In addition, we asked the
received for the cost of vaccine / travelers, as our group insurance does not cover. Subsequently, in August 2008 (four months later), we have been reminded of the Engerix B
. Finally, in September 2008, we received a final injection of the vaccine Twinrix
cons of
hepatitis A and hepatitis B
.
